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Hello, we're back. This is April.
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April and I are going to have a fireside chat here.
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I'll try not to swing back and forth; I think the fly has left me alone.
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During Kerry's talk, I thought I was going crazy with it buzzing around my head, but here we are.
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A couple of weeks ago, I was on Twitter, as I often am, and April had sparked some great conversations.
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All Twitter conversations end up being fractured into multiple sub-conversations.
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I suggested we get together and discuss some of these topics in person.
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April was able to join us today. Can you provide a quick background on who you are and what you do?
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Sure! Just to clarify from the start, I'm not in HR and I'm not a recruiter.
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I am an engineer and have been for the past ten years professionally, and fifteen years total.
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I've worked at a variety of startups in Silicon Valley.
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I recently relocated to San Diego and I'm now primarily focused on Ruby on Rails development.
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However, I consider myself a generalist and have worked in various capacities.
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Most recently, I founded Compassionate Coding, my own company.
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My goal is to bring emotional intelligence to the software development community.
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This includes not just hiring practices but also improving team communication.
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We need to start valuing the human element of software development as it deserves.
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Pretty often, when you start a conversation with a team, you walk into an office and people think, 'Oh, here's the lady who's going to tell us to be nice to each other.' Is that how it goes?
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No, because I usually do the background work ahead of time to get buy-in from leadership.
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We discuss how important these issues are to the organization.
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A common misconception is that compassion is synonymous with being nice.
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I would not necessarily consider myself a nice person; I've been called abrasive.
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However, I still consider myself compassionate.
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Compassion, for me, is an optimization problem with the goal of minimizing suffering.
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It means recognizing suffering in others and actively desiring to alleviate that suffering.
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Sarah and I were chatting earlier, and I mentioned that I've started to wonder if software development is actually quite simple.
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The people who build the software are inextricably linked to the software itself.
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While the software part might be straightforward, it is the people that are really complicated.
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Was that your experience when you were working full-time in development?
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How did you transition from being an individual contributor writing code to now working with teams?
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Absolutely. That's spot-on. A lot of the problems I encountered on teams were people problems—communication issues.
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For instance, we wanted to introduce a new tool, but someone wouldn’t get on board.
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That's a human problem. You might be discussing technology, but convincing someone to adopt a new tool is fundamentally a human issue.
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I was reading a study from the Application Developer Alliance about why software projects fail.
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The top reason was changing or poorly documented requirements.
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Only 17% cited immature development tools as a reason.
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Yet, a lot of our engineering energy is focused on building new frameworks, when the failures often stem from communication.
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It needs to happen among the engineers, product people, design folks, and the customers.
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An old friend in the industry, a consulting team lead, once said, 'I've never seen a project fail for technical reasons.'
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Looking at the hoarding analogy that Sara was illustrating, I think many of us felt a similar anxiety.
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It's not just the physical state; it's often about the underlying human issues.
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Software problems are generally easier to fix. You can measure them, set goals, and prove whether you met those goals.
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When someone reaches out for help, it's often when everything is on fire.
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Is it usually when all is lost and you're called in to help?
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Kind of, yes. That's why I often don’t openly discuss the companies I work with.
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Sometimes, they’re in a state that might be a bit embarrassing; they wouldn’t want to admit it publicly.
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Occasionally, it’s just an isolated incident, and they genuinely want help to deal with it.
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The therapy comparison is valid—often, I feel like I'm doing a form of group therapy.
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I would never call it that, but I help people communicate and build empathy.
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It's difficult to measure empathy on a team clearly, but certain indicators exist.
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For example, retention rates and the frequency of conflicts on communication platforms like Slack.
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You can even gauge how many tantrums happen, which surprisingly occurs more often than one would think.
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Incorporating surveys is not a perfect method to measure the atmosphere, but it helps.
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You can analyze attitudes around psychological safety and feeling supported.
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I find it funny how many engagements often start with Slack logs of complaints.
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People think their situation is a disaster, yet there are always teams in worse positions.
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It doesn’t mean the entire company or team is broken; it's often just the context.
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In the hiring process, when prospective hires are selected without attention to their communication or conflict resolution skills, it leads to issues.
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However, this is an exercise in growth; recognizing your hiring practices allowed this situation.
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Developers build confidence when they visit other companies.
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In my experience as a technical trainer, I often discovered that teams really didn't know what they were doing.
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It's fascinating how that mindset shifts how you view your own capabilities.
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Do you notice similar things when you walk into a new team on a consultancy?
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Do you generally find teams that need a simple tune-up?
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Or are there times when it feels like they need to be completely overhauled?
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In most cases, the solution isn’t to start from scratch. It's about incremental improvement.
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When I come in, teams tend to feel self-conscious about their challenges.
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They often warn me about their logs in advance.
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But I've seen it all before, so I try to be reassuring.
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On a personal level, despite working on my self-awareness and emotional management, I still have my moments.
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So I believe in a growth mindset—getting better over time is the goal.
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Do you ever encounter conversations where people say, 'My team is awesome, except for this one person?'
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Does that resonate with you?
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Ironically, I often get along best with the challenging team members.
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They often have potential for growth.
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Many times, I find their destructive behavior is rooted in passion.
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They may care deeply about certain aspects of the project and react strongly.
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I help teams unpack these dynamics and understand each other's triggers.
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However, if someone exhibits openly racist or sexist behavior, that’s a different issue.
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In such cases, it's important to remove such individuals from the team.
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How do I, as an individual, identify if I am that difficult person?
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Asking that question is already a good sign.
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We all have a bit of a jerk in us.
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I’ve received feedback that I can be abrasive, which is a common experience for many women.
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I used to struggle with providing constructive feedback in code reviews.
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What I didn’t understand was how my critiques could affect others.
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Learning to deliver feedback effectively is part of the emotional intelligence journey.
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I consider myself a recovered difficult person.
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If I can change, anyone can.
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What first impressions do you look for when assessing a team's potential?
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I never believe any team is hopeless. There’s always potential for change.
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However, certain members may need assistance getting on board.
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What I look for often goes beyond technical issues to reveal underlying people problems.
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Even when a technical issue is presented, I seek to understand the real emotional underpinnings.
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For example, if there are complaints about video conferencing tools, I look for the interpersonal dynamics.
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It's essential to dig deeper to find where the disconnect exists.
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You can identify issues when team members are sequestered and working individually without communication.
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In most cases, it proves effective for remote teams to gather together once a year.
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Face-to-face interaction is critical in emotional intelligence workshops.
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So much communication is lost when relying on text; we must prioritize human contact.
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Communicating critical topics requires a wider bandwidth, ranging from text to phone calls.
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The choice of communication method should reflect the topic's importance.
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Often, trivial issues mask deeper, more significant cultural conflicts.
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Navigating team dynamics continuously evolves as the team undergoes changes.
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Companies must evaluate their hiring processes in response to these dynamics.
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The best teams often have a rubric in place to assess candidates.
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A rubric standardizes measuring candidate performance and competencies.
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The key is striving for objectivity, recognizing we are all inherently biased.
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Recognizing biases is crucial to improve hiring processes, as they often impact outcomes.
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Effective rubrics should focus on specific attributes and cultural fit, avoiding unnecessary complexity.
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Hiring should not resemble a bureaucratic process of ticking boxes; it should feel meaningful.
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Hiring should focus on more than just cultural likability; it must assess contributions.
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Ultimately, building a team that works well together is the goal, not personal friendships.
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Medium has a valuable blog post discussing hiring practices, emphasizing introspection and empathy.
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Specific examples of candidate behavior indicate their ability to relate and understand.
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As engineers often lack training in psychology, the interview process becomes complex.
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Collectively, we must reevaluate hiring practices and ensure communication and connection are prioritized.
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Hiring practices should target deeper motivations, not just code-focused interests.
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Ultimately, the vulnerability should extend to asking candidates deeper questions during interviews.
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Ask them to speak about their passion for solving human problems, not just programming.
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Teams that face difficulties require a higher purpose to motivate them through challenges.
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Everyone has something to contribute, regardless of their titles or backgrounds.
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Although I may not lead interviews, I can advocate for these changes.
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Start conversations with your team leads and suggest how they can improve processes.
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Find a way to make it easy for management to agree to your suggestions.
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Successfully pitching ideas for change can make a significant impact.
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Being proactive in suggesting improvements will elevate your visibility in the organization.
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I've witnessed people progress from individual contributor roles to leadership positions simply by advocating.
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We're starting to see more companies create clear pathways for engineers to advance their careers.
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However, I find that misunderstanding still exists within companies.
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There's often confusion around definitions like junior developer versus senior developer.
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This often leads to arbitrary distinctions that vary across organizations.
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Moreover, the technical versus managerial paths often create a false dichotomy.
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Everyone should cultivate leadership skills, even as an individual contributor.
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The skills of emotional intelligence and leading one's life translate to improvement in team dynamics.
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In the context of the 10x engineer, it reflects that many developers do not belong in their roles.
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Building a strong team is the best method for achieving a 10x impact.
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It's about fostering a strong culture around collaboration and support.
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Do we have any questions from the audience? What common unconscious mistakes do you see?
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The most significant mistake in hiring is defining what 'smart' means.
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Often, companies rely on biased metrics: IQ tests or standardized performance.
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Realizing that intelligence can manifest from a variety of backgrounds is essential.
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Cultural and experiential diversity contributes deeply to team success.
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How does emotional intelligence impact company culture?
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Instilling emotional intelligence is paramount to addressing company culture.
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It helps identify where shifts in culture are needed and gives individuals the tools to manage their emotions.
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At the conclusion of my workshops, we create an actionable plan for company culture improvement.
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Your work environment should not inhibit vulnerability nor genuine conversation.
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True cultural change requires commitment from leadership and employees.
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Vulnerability should be encouraged, and humility must be valued above ego.
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Select workplaces where you can fully express yourself and appreciate vulnerability.
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Cultivating a culture of growth allows for forgiveness and promotes authentic leadership.
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Thank you, April.