Hire Me: I'm Excellent at Quitting

by Brittany Martin

In her talk "Hire Me: I'm Excellent at Quitting," presented at RubyConf 2019, Brittany Martin delves into the often-taboo subject of quitting jobs, particularly in the tech industry, and highlights the importance of making this choice with intent and professionalism.

Key Points Discussed:
- Value of Quitting: Martin emphasizes that quitting a job is not a defeat but a strategic move to pursue better opportunities. Decisions to leave should focus on personal growth and career advancement.
- Statistics on Developer Satisfaction: Referring to the Stack Overflow annual survey, she notes that while many developers feel satisfied in their careers, a significant number are not satisfied with their current jobs, suggesting a frequent desire for change.
- Reasons for Quitting: Factors that typically drive developers to leave include seeking better pay or work conditions, the opportunity for autonomy, and alignment with personal values or career aspirations.
- Advice for Quitting Gracefully: Martin suggests various steps to take when preparing to leave a job:
- Keep intentions discreet and professional, avoid burnout before quitting, and actively engage in networking.
- Do not include current bosses or coworkers as references until after leaving.
- Plan the conversation to quit in a thoughtful and respectful manner, considering emotional impacts on both the employee and employer.
- Avoiding Pitfalls: She warns against accepting counteroffers purely based on money since that rarely addresses the underlying reasons for the dissatisfaction.
- Striving for Exit on Good Terms: Martin advises on maintaining connections and relationships post-quitting to ensure bridges are not burned.
- Boomerang Employees: She discusses the growing trend of "boomerang employees," emphasizing that leaving on good terms can reopen opportunities in the future.

Takeaways: Martin encourages attendees to have "career courage" and be proactive about their future happiness and career fulfillment. The emphasis throughout her talk is on the idea that quitting, when done thoughtfully, can open doors to new opportunities and foster professional growth. Practicing graceful exits and maintaining network relationships can lead to positive outcomes both in personal and career journeys. Ultimately, she inspires developers to trust their instincts about when to leave and to prioritize their happiness at work.

00:00:12.389 Greetings, RubyConf! My name is Brittany Martin, and guess what? I'm great at quitting.

00:00:18.189 There are a lot of great talks. I want to thank you for joining me today. Also, we're not alone; this is the live stream room. So, if we could all turn around and give our friends on the live stream a wave, we wish you were here, but thank you so much for watching.

00:00:31.930 Speaking of RubyConf, it has been one of my personal career goals. I just never thought it was going to be about quitting. I cannot express enough my gratitude to the event organizers for this incredible event they have pulled off.

00:00:45.159 I also want to thank our awesome captioner today. I have been taught that if you read something, it must be true, so it's wonderful to have this captioning to make everything accessible. Thank you also to our amazing audio-visual team. It's a tough job, but it's so great that this talk is so accessible.

00:00:58.239 I am the lead web developer at the Pittsburgh Cultural Trust. The Pittsburgh Cultural Trust is one of the largest nonprofits in Pittsburgh, and its goal is to bring the arts to the people of Pittsburgh. Founded in 1984, it promotes economic and cultural development in downtown Pittsburgh. I've been working there for about four years now. Funny enough, I love my job so much that I feel I have actually peaked in my career.

00:01:11.080 However, when I told my boss that this would be the title of my talk, he definitely made a face. Now, pictured here is my best buddy George Lazenby, also known as Chewbacca Brown — it's a little bit of a short name.

00:01:24.790 I am also the host of the Ruby on Rails podcast, a weekly conversation about Ruby on Rails, open source, and the programming profession. The best part of running the podcast is getting to ask questions of my heroes and also bringing new voices in our community onto the show. I am always open for feedback, comments, and of course, guests. And I'm serious about that! If you've never been on a podcast and you have something interesting to say, please come talk to me after this talk.

00:01:50.680 Speaking of podcasts, I was recently a guest on The Bike Shed, talking about quitting. I think it's going to become my thing, and Steff is an excellent host. So, I mean, if you enjoy this talk, I highly recommend checking out that episode and subscribing to The Bike Shed Views; it's an excellent podcast.

00:02:02.470 Lastly, I am the president of the Little Steel Derby Girls, a roller derby team in Youngstown, Ohio. People get into roller derby for all types of reasons, but most of them are looking for a community. It's not whether you get knocked down; it's whether or not you get back up again.

00:02:39.840 So enough about me! Why am I here talking about quitting? To take on a new opportunity, it's very likely that you need to quit something in order to take advantage of that opportunity. There's lots of content on hiring, but what about quitting? Now, wait a minute—why should I be the one giving this talk? I've just told you that I love my job and have been there for four years. What's going on there?

00:03:06.390 Over the course of my career, I've had several 'Hey boss, I'm quitting' talks. One involved tears of sadness, one involved tears of happiness, and one even had my boss asking me if he could come with me.

00:03:12.390 In my career, I've actually migrated from marketing and sales into a product manager role. As I learned to code, I also evolved from a purely technical support role into a full-time developer. Those two transitions accounted for a lot of jobs I've quit in the past ten years; actually, I consider myself a certified quitter.

00:03:30.060 I recommend that you spend time reflecting on the opportunities you've quit in the past because there are so many roads that you can take. One thing is certain: what you have quit in the past very much shapes where you are today. Quitting is not giving up; it's choosing to focus your attention on something far more important.

00:03:47.250 Quitting is not losing confidence; it's realizing that there are more valuable ways to spend your time. And of course, quitting is not making excuses; it's learning to be more productive, efficient, and effective instead.

00:04:02.220 There is indeed a lot of time and many things to quit, but for the sake of focus today, we are going to concentrate on quitting jobs that fall within your career. A lot of the advice and statistics are coming from individuals who've been hired and quit jobs in the United States. Here's a quick disclaimer: I believe a lot of the advice I have to share today is still applicable to anyone outside of this country.

00:04:32.289 That being said, I do like to be entertained, and I bet you do too! If you have a good story about quitting, please tweet it out to me. My Twitter handle is on each of the slides for your tweeting pleasure. I’m all ears, and if we have some time at the end, I certainly want to hear any quick horror stories that you might want to share.

00:04:58.839 Ever heard the expression 'never burn a bridge'? It means that you end a relationship in such a way that you can never go back and restart that relationship. If you did choose to go back, you would have to beg your way to forgiveness in order to restart that opportunity. One tale I love to share is about someone in a DevOps position who decided to quit their job by going into the server room and severing every single cable to every single device in there. I'd consider that bridge pretty burnt.

00:05:22.959 Before we get into the actual act of quitting, let's dive into some background. The first question to ask ourselves is, what's going on with our careers as developers? The truth is, we are just so lucky. According to the U.S. Labor Bureau, the job outlook growth for web developers is more than double the national average for all job growth up until 2026.

00:05:48.309 The reason for this is there is a huge growing need for developers, and that's why desperate employers in metropolitan areas around the nation are paying top dollar to web developers, software developers, and any developer who can demonstrate the skills they need to get the job done.

00:06:02.220 I include myself in this, but many of us have bet our careers to either start or shift into software development. As someone who's formerly from a marketing and sales background, I appreciate the continued education, great pay, and stability that this career brings me. The national unemployment rate is at a near record low, with more job openings than candidates to fill them.

00:06:30.279 The technology sector has one of the fewest people available for all vacant positions. Where can we turn for answers on how developers feel about their careers? We look to our tried-and-true source: Stack Overflow. Stack Overflow's annual developer survey is one of the largest and most comprehensive surveys of people who code around the world.

00:06:50.130 Over 90,000 people participated in this 20-minute survey that just took place. The first question to dive into is, 'How satisfied are you with your current job?' Well, as it turns out, developers tend to be more satisfied with their careers in general than with their current jobs. You can see here that about 20% of developers surveyed are at least a little dissatisfied with their jobs.

00:07:10.630 Now, let's examine what developers hope to be doing in five years. I love this question because as developers, we should all be forward-thinking about what's coming next in our careers. We shouldn't just stay stagnant and think about what we're doing now. Interestingly, developers' career goals are largely focused on technical work; over half of the respondents say they want to be in the same or a different technical role in the future. About a quarter of developers say they want to start their own company.

00:07:44.950 This makes perfect sense. If you're a developer who can grasp marketing and sales skills, you are an amazing combination and can build your own company. Now, let's look at how long ago developers last changed jobs. It’s kind of encouraging that more than 50% of surveyed developers have switched jobs in the last two years, which puts me in that bottom 20%.

00:08:10.600 This is a weird feeling, as so many of my co-workers at the nonprofit I work at proudly tout the fact that they've been there for over ten years. Lastly, here's an interesting question: are you actively looking for a new job? While a full three-quarters of developers are interested in hearing about new job opportunities, only 16% are actively looking.

00:08:35.960 This is fascinating because a common meme circulating in our community is that developers aren't interested in what recruiters have to say. The stats, however, tell a different story. So knowing this, why do we choose to leave our jobs? Clearly, it's for the cash, right? All problems can be solved if we’re compensated more. That’s absolutely false; money is relative.

00:09:04.399 It turns out we don’t mind so much about our actual level of income as long as we can afford our basic needs with some extra for entertainment and savings. We seek new opportunities for various reasons: autonomy, the ability to shape your work environment, motivation, personal growth, and of course, preparing for retirement.

00:09:20.149 Have you excelled in your current role? Have you grown to your full potential? If you've answered yes, then perhaps it's time for you to move on to the next stage of your career. Moving into a larger or perhaps a new position might seem like an obvious next step.

00:09:43.190 A definite reason for us to celebrate quitting is that we are all taking wonderful care of our health and financial futures. Preparing for retirement as a software developer could be a wonderful conference talk in itself. People tend to be happiest in their 60s and 70s when work responsibilities have been shed, the kids have grown, and everyday stress levels melt away.

00:10:10.289 I recently had a co-worker declare that she is going to be retiring at the end of the year, and I couldn't be more happy for her. She's in great health, loves her family, and has all kinds of plans for what she wants to do. You should think about that as a valid reason to consider quitting too.

00:10:36.629 When should you decide to move on? If you suspect that you are not being paid what you are worth, do your research. The best way to set your personal salary range is to use an anonymous salary calculator based on surveys from thousands of workers with your job title, skill set, education, and geographic location.

00:11:08.200 Do not trust anecdotal information from coworkers. If you suspect a pay disparity, consult your boss or your Human Resources representative. If they won't even discuss it, that's likely a telling sign that something negative is going on.

00:11:26.540 Negative energy is another sign you should leave. If you are consistently bringing negativity into your home and work life, you might be too comfortable; you may be coasting along. You might tell yourself it’s just a job, and you can do your job with your eyes closed. That's a lot of negative energy that you don't need.

00:11:52.949 Have you become a sad cheerleader? You may find yourself not cheering for your employer's successes, innovations, and plans. If you're feeling uninspired and never want to go to work, you’re making careless mistakes, or the environment is toxic or negatively affects your mental or physical health, your career might be stagnant.

00:12:14.060 You could be bored or overloaded. Perhaps your organization itself is going downhill, or there are no excellent opportunities for growth. In some cases, you are not being heard at work. You might have valuable insights, but nobody's listening, or worse, people may be taking credit for your work.

00:12:43.300 So you’ve decided to leave. How will you do it gracefully? There are many talks about hiring, and this is definitely not one of them, but I will give you a shameless plug. If you want to hear some great advice, check out episode 287 of the Ruby on Rails podcast. Brian Mariani, founder of Me Replacement, a Ruby on Rails-focused recruiting firm, discusses the Ruby job market, the companies and technologies employers are looking for, and key interview tips.

00:13:08.770 If you're looking for a new job, I highly recommend you start here: RubyConf has an on-site job board where anyone can post job openings. I checked, and it’s absolutely full to the brim. What I am here for is to offer advice on what to do when you're looking for your next opportunity. There's a lot of fear that quitting your job is going to ruin your reputation, and we know how precious our reputation is to us. Your reputation is important, so if you want to leave on good terms, you have to be stealthy and smart.

00:14:09.260 Starting off, don't leave before you leave. If you have a job, stick with it and act like you’re going to be at that job for the rest of your life. Do not check out at your current job because that could lead to you not having a job anymore—you could get fired for it. You want to come at your job search from a position of strength.

00:14:36.720 Do not cry wolf; no one wants to work with someone who constantly says they are going to quit. That type of negativity will likely lead you to be fired. If you are getting ready to quit, find a confidant outside of work to confide in about your negative feelings. Search quietly and update your LinkedIn profile—yes, it's a necessary thing.

00:14:53.670 Do not post your resume on job boards and don't drop hints that you're leaving. Be smart about scheduling; schedule interviews outside of work hours as much as possible. Don't sabotage yourself by double-booking yourself.

00:15:16.720 Don't include your co-workers or bosses as references, and ask your prospective employer to be discreet. If your prospective employer chooses not to be discreet with you, that's probably a telling sign that you shouldn't be going there. Try job search networking; it works! At least 60% of jobs are found through networking.

00:15:39.260 Reach out to contacts, friends, family, neighbors, college alumni, or Ruby friends—anyone who might help generate information and job leads. It’s amazing who knows who, but keep that in mind: everybody knows everybody.

00:15:53.110 So, if you're looking to leave, make sure you're discreet. And remember that you have an ever-watchful future employer. As the title of this talk is 'Hire Me: I'm Great at Quitting.' If you leave your job on bad terms, your next employer is watching you. They might even try to test you.

00:16:11.090 They could see if you won't give two weeks to your next employer or if you're willing to sign a hastily written contract. Whatever you do to your current employer, it’s likely that you’ll do to your next employer. So, we want to keep you as hireable as possible.

00:16:35.480 Finally, it’s time to quit! How do you go about doing it gracefully? Well, it’s both a science and an art. Quitting your job requires a lot of courage and skill. You can feel guilty about leaving your job, especially if your boss has invested in your personal development, but ultimately, you need to do what is best for your career.

00:17:02.290 I have an exciting announcement to share with you today: I have been developing a product on how to make this transition seamlessly. Introducing the 'Quitting Kit'—these are the tools that you need to quit as guiltlessly and smoothly as possible.

00:17:20.760 Stick with me, Ruby friends; we’re going places! As for professionalism, don’t tell your colleagues about your plans before you tell your manager. You must quit in person and give at least two weeks' notice. Make sure, if you are remote, to schedule a meeting with your boss with your camera on.

00:17:44.260 This is a very personal interaction. Review your employment contract if you have one. The next aspect is discomfort. You’re going to need to be comfortable with being uncomfortable—you're not the first person to quit, and you certainly won't be the last.

00:18:08.000 Be sure to know exactly what message you want to convey before you approach your boss. You don’t want to stumble over your words, and even if you’re leaving on good terms, the conversation will likely be a bit awkward and difficult.

00:18:28.000 Lead that conversation and understand that you may be ruining your boss's day. Stand firm in your decision and be prepared for any potential questions or objections your manager brings up. Are you prepared to say no to a counteroffer?

00:18:49.720 While a counteroffer can be very tempting, make sure you don’t fall into that trap or blindside yourself to your own detriment. It’s already stressful to make a big decision, and a lot will change.

00:19:05.800 You’re about to uproot yourself from familiar co-workers, your commute, and everything else. Remember, cash does not solve problems. If the counteroffer is purely about the money, really think about what that’s going to add to your general life.

00:19:32.810 Even if you provide two weeks' notice as a courtesy to your current company, your boss could ask you to leave immediately. This can happen. There are no federal or state laws in the U.S. requiring employers to provide their employees a two-week notice.

00:20:04.140 So, are you prepared to lose an additional two weeks of pay or possible health coverage? One concept to consider is the 'bus factor.' This is a measurement of the risk resulting from information and capabilities not being shared amongst team members. It’s derived from the idea that if someone got hit by a bus...

00:20:20.220 ...you need to ensure that everything you do is documented, shared, and comprehensible to others. While this is tedious, trust me, it will be so helpful to have every detail outlined so you can reference it with your co-workers later.

00:20:46.500 Out of all your colleagues, the ones you typically grow closest to are your teammates, and they deserve to know about your future plans directly from you. Your goodbye email should reflect all the positive moments you shared with your teammates, and please express gratitude for the opportunity of working alongside them.

00:21:05.790 Remember those tasks that stressed you out the most? Make sure your co-workers have the tools to handle those tasks with ease. While they may not immediately thank you for this, I guarantee they will be cursing you less once you are gone, and that’s important to keep those bridges intact.

00:21:24.549 Quitting is not a betrayal, but it can be difficult and might involve a tearful goodbye. Once, while driving to quit my first job, I had to pull over on the side of the road and threw up. I took the time to be upset so I could be as professional as possible when I entered my boss's office.

00:21:41.320 Efforts to maintain relationships with your co-workers will pay off in the long run, as some of my very dearest friends are people I’ve worked with in the past. With any good kit, you'll have core components, but there are also optional accessories to consider.

00:22:05.260 Having a successor in place is optional, and it’s normally your choice to decide whether to assist in selecting that successor. If you are involved, you can help write the job description and ensure the best fit for that role. If not, your successor has space to design the job as they see fit.

00:22:20.420 Believe it or not, leaving is prime time to ask your co-workers to write recommendations for you and, in turn, offer the same to them. Conducting an exit interview is entirely up to you and your company’s culture.

00:22:38.509 I've seen some places make it optional, while others require it. These conversations allow your employer to learn what they need to do to retain key employees. Be honest about your reasons for leaving, but be careful if you feel you need to criticize individual peers or supervisors.

00:23:03.850 Remember that very few problems are one-sided. Before I pause for a quick drink, I’ve provided a tweetable version of the quitting kit to share with you.

00:23:21.690 Now, I've just spent a lot of time convincing you that you should quit. However, we do need to stop and consider if there are situations where you should stay. What if you really shouldn't quit your job?

00:23:35.889 Here are some considerations to think about: Can the situation be fixed? You might love everybody except that one person. Working with people is tough. Everything could be going great until one person decides they have it out for you.

00:23:52.030 Don't let that one person control your career. Take a stand and/or try to empathize with them to fix the situation. If leadership is lacking but change is coming, hold tight. This might lead to positive changes in your organization.

00:24:08.219 If boundaries are not set, consider setting them. I'm a recovering people-pleaser with a compulsion to say ‘no problem’ without thinking. This usually leads to stress and resentment, which isn’t good for me or fair to my coworkers.

00:24:33.279 If you find yourself without boundaries, approach your boss. Let them know what you hope to gain from your current position and the responsibilities that align with your career goals. You shouldn't wait, hoping your job role will change on its own.

00:24:52.800 If you truly love the company mission and still believe in it, contemplate if it's worth fighting to stay. After making strides to improve your work situation, if the idea of staying for another five years fills you with excitement instead of panic, perhaps you've found your place.

00:25:27.800 Have you still decided to quit? Things are going fine at your new gig, but you kind of wonder if you made a mistake. Good news: You may be able to boomerang back. Boomerang employees—those who voluntarily leave a job and rejoin at a later date—are gaining acceptance from hiring managers and the labor force.

00:25:53.860 They want known quantities. This acceptance is partly due to the tight job market. Companies want to know who they are bringing back. Boomerang employees often return with a fresh perspective, having gained new experience elsewhere.

00:26:21.770 According to workplace trends, three out of four employees would be willing to rehire former employees who performed well and left on good terms. So, remember: don’t burn bridges. If a company faces a talent shortage, they'll need to give every employee a reason to return.

00:26:46.180 If you decide to boomerang back, be prepared to reintroduce yourself to everyone. Reset their expectations about you and reset your expectations about everyone you worked with before. Above all, remain positive; the company culture may have completely changed in your absence, so be ready for that.

00:27:04.370 We've reached the end of our quitting journey, and I hope I have inspired you. I want to remind you of one very specific idea: you only get one life. Do you often find yourself daydreaming about living a different life? Do you know what it would take to fulfill that dream, especially regarding your career happiness?

00:27:29.500 Practicing career courage can make the difference between an exciting and fulfilling career and one where your greatest talents are underutilized. Be brave: just because quitting is a little scary doesn’t mean it’s not a positive move for you.

00:28:02.529 Bravery involves knowing what is important to you; none of this comes without experience. Trust in yourself when it's time to quit. I want you to quit with finesse, purpose, grace, and professionalism. Thank you!

00:28:13.820 So, this is kind of an odd talk to have a Q&A, but I can certainly take questions. However, I also thought if anyone has any fun quitting stories to share, that would be very cool. Do we have a microphone?

00:28:40.070 Oh, great question! This is something that actually happened to me before. If you're in a poor mental state and want to transition smoothly but are struggling, it's important to note that your two-week notice doesn’t have to be full-time. At one company, I cut my hours instead of working eight hours a day. I let them know I would be available during these reduced hours, and I took time off to decompress before starting my new job.

00:29:07.200 That’s a good question! I’d also like to highlight the importance of taking extra time if you can, especially if you have the privilege. This can help you reset and become ready for that next job in a full, healthy way.

00:29:32.370 Another audience member raised an interesting point about a recruiter who may pressure you to skip two weeks' notice. It’s crucial not to allow your current employer to pressure you into staying longer than you feel is acceptable.

00:29:52.280 In the event your current employer is constantly hounding you for information, you could consider setting up a contractor agreement with them for your time or simply cut it off completely. Be clear about that, and make sure you maintain that boundary.

00:30:15.690 A question was asked about how to handle it as a manager when a cherished employee comes to resign. In that situation, step into the employee’s shoes for a day to understand what's happening. You may discover that the employee has too much responsibility or doesn't have enough, and as a result, you can reassess workloads.

00:30:40.050 It's crucial to have an honest conversation separate from the exit interview, which is usually an official, HR-led process. This allows you to understand why they are leaving and helps create a more positive team environment.

00:30:55.800 Thank you so much for attending today. I appreciate you all being here, and I hope you enjoy the lightning talks.