Giulia Mialich
One-on-One: the benefit you should look for

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One-on-One: the benefit you should look for

Giulia Mialich • June 16, 2023 • Verona, Italy

In the talk titled "One-on-One: the benefit you should look for", Giulia Mialich, an engineering manager with over a decade of development experience, discusses the crucial role of one-on-one meetings in fostering a healthy company culture. Despite being recognized as valuable tools for communication, conflict reduction, and employee motivation, one-on-one meetings often fall short of their potential due to inconsistent human interactions.

Key points discussed include:

  • Definition of One-on-Ones: Explained as regular check-ins between managers and employees aimed at coaching, mentoring, and providing a space for personal growth.
  • Importance of Regular Meetings: Emphasized that regular scheduling is essential, as these meetings create opportunities for open communication and personal insights.
  • The Cascade Effect: Illustrated how a committed and engaged employee can influence the overall team dynamic positively.
  • Employee Engagement Statistics: Noted that only 20% of employees report feeling engaged at work, but implementing one-on-ones can potentially triple that engagement.
  • Practices for Effective One-on-Ones: Suggested that meetings should have a consistent schedule, possibly an agenda, a focus on active listening, and goals to monitor progress.
  • Scope for Personal Engagement: Highlighted the need for these discussions to cover both technical and personal topics, particularly in a remote working environment.
  • Role of Managers: Asserts that a manager’s role in these meetings is primarily to listen, guide, and support their team members.

Giulia also addresses challenges such as managing a diverse team with potential resistance to sharing personal information, emphasizing tailoring approaches to suit individual comfort levels. She concludes by advocating for a culture that fosters and embraces connective one-on-ones, urging individuals to take initiative in proposing these meetings if they are not already part of their company's practices. The overarching message underscores the dual benefits of these interactions for both managers and employees and their significant impact on team dynamics and satisfaction.

Overall, the session serves as an insightful resource for anyone looking to enhance their team management skills and highlights how effective one-on-ones can positively shape a company’s culture and employee engagement levels.

One-on-One: the benefit you should look for
Giulia Mialich • June 16, 2023 • Verona, Italy

One-on-one meetings are crucial for promoting a healthy company culture, but do the participants truly recognize their value?
The theory says these meetings provide an excellent opportunity for managers and employees to improve communication, reduce conflicts, and increase job satisfaction and motivation. The reality shows that one-on-one effectiveness relies heavily on human interactions, making success unpredictable.

During the session, we'll explore effective practices to help answer questions such as:
What makes one-on-one meetings effective for managers and what for engineers?
How can we effectively communicate with silent individuals during these meetings?
Should we establish an agenda for the meeting or not?
Should personal matters be discussed during those sections?

This talk is a must-attend if you want to improve your team management skills or gain insight into how one-on-one meetings can contribute to your professional development.

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rubyday 2023 happened in Verona on 16th June 2023

Info and details of this edition:
2023.rubyday.it/

rubyday 2023

00:00:00.400 Hi, I'm Giulia. I'm an engineering manager now, but I have more than ten years of development experience.
00:00:06.640 I'm not in love with the code as much as I am in love with people, and this became evident as my seniority grew.
00:00:12.160 I discovered that I found more satisfaction in helping the individuals around me than in coding.
00:00:19.480 This realization became even more evident during the pandemic when we essentially moved all our lives to our homes.
00:00:28.960 Removing the social interaction that was part of our daily experience highlighted how impactful our relationships with our colleagues were.
00:00:50.920 As you can hear, I am not a native English speaker, so I appreciate your kindness.
00:00:58.039 This is my first time speaking here, and it has been a dream for a long time. I'm very happy to be here with you.
00:01:04.879 I don't know if you'll find answers in this talk, but I have a lot of questions for you.
00:01:11.000 Since you know me now, I want to know you. I'd like to understand how many of you are developers.
00:01:18.360 By developers, I mean not directors or managers—just developers.
00:01:25.759 Good, luckily, the majority of you are developers, so this talk makes sense.
00:01:33.399 Let's start from the definition. This talk is about one-on-ones.
00:01:45.759 You can find a lot of definitions online, but I believe the two I’m sharing are the most meaningful.
00:01:55.440 The first definition is that a one-on-one is a regular check-in between two people in an organization.
00:02:02.239 Usually, I'm referring to a manager and an employee, but we can discuss who the employee is, as even the manager is an employee.
00:02:09.560 For the purposes of this talk, let's focus on these two figures: the manager and the employee.
00:02:17.360 This means that the manager has to manage people, typically individual contributors or ICs.
00:02:27.920 One-on-one meetings are places where you can coach, mentor, and give context to people.
00:02:35.080 You can listen to them if they're frustrated or happy about something.
00:02:40.159 However, there's something more in these sentences that may not be very easy to understand at first.
00:02:47.640 The idea is that both participants grow in their roles.
00:02:55.440 Despite the hierarchy, both the manager and the employee will experience personal growth.
00:03:02.239 Additionally, the one-on-one must have a dedicated place in your calendar and in your mental map.
00:03:09.560 This meeting involves being a human being, significantly.
00:03:16.080 Now that you know what a one-on-one meeting is, how regularly do you meet your manager?
00:03:25.520 Do you meet him or her regularly? Can you raise your hand?
00:03:31.920 It seems that you are in a lucky group. Here’s a representation of some well-known tech companies.
00:03:40.560 They explicitly encourage their managers to regularly meet their direct reports.
00:03:45.520 When you’re a kid, and you do something silly, you might tell your mom, 'I did it, but my friends did it too.'
00:03:53.600 For many Italians, the response is often 'Perfect!'—you should jump off the roof along with them.
00:03:59.600 One-on-one meetings are encouraged, but are we doing them just because everyone else is?
00:04:07.200 I discovered one-on-ones when I started working as an engineering manager nearly two years ago.
00:04:15.680 They were not part of the company culture in my past experiences.
00:04:22.960 I often felt like, 'Oh no, it’s that time again; I have to meet my director,' and felt anxious about it.
00:04:29.160 The expectation was that I was not doing something right or my performance was lacking.
00:04:36.160 The feeling was similar to a dental procedure—uncomfortable but necessary.
00:04:42.480 Yet, I began to go deeper and discovered that we were actually in the realm of soft skills.
00:04:52.160 This isn't a technical talk, but understanding soft skills and measuring them can be very challenging.
00:05:00.800 Statistically speaking, the average employee spends between six and eight hours per week doing one-on-ones.
00:05:08.160 That is a considerable amount of time and, consequently, a lot of money for companies.
00:05:16.520 So why are companies willing to invest so much in these meetings?
00:05:21.680 Spoiler alert: the return on investment is substantial.
00:05:29.080 Companies aren't being benevolent; they want to spend their resources on something valuable.
00:05:36.520 This brings me to the concept of the Cascade Effect.
00:05:44.920 If you work with someone who is highly committed and genuinely cares about their job, it’s likely that you'll be influenced by their engagement.
00:05:52.480 If your manager is enthusiastic, you'll resonate with that energy and improve your own engagement.
00:06:03.000 This ultimately leads to better performance and satisfaction, which is fundamental for any company.
00:06:11.280 In tech companies, employees, particularly ICs, drive the last mile of work.
00:06:19.080 If they are happy and engaged, they will produce better results.
00:06:27.760 However, the reality is troubling: approximately 20% of people report feeling engaged in their work.
00:06:35.320 This is a small percentage, and the great news is that implementing one-on-ones can multiply engagement threefold.
00:06:42.720 The question now is how we can keep people engaged.
00:06:50.320 First, I can create space for them to discuss their thoughts.
00:06:56.720 These discussions shouldn't only be technical—they should provide a platform for personal engagement.
00:07:04.960 You should listen to each individual's opinion, as every opinion has its own value.
00:07:14.840 As a manager, having one-on-one meetings gives you valuable insight into what's happening in the team.
00:07:20.720 In larger companies, you can't directly observe team dynamics.
00:07:27.720 Understanding what is going on within your team is crucial.
00:07:34.560 You also have to take action to maintain a positive atmosphere.
00:07:41.840 Monitoring toxic dynamics before they develop into serious issues is a very effective strategy.
00:07:49.760 Preventing issues is always better than confronting significant problems later.
00:07:56.480 With one-on-ones, you can clearly see how they contribute positively to job satisfaction and motivation.
00:08:03.760 A structure of being listened to fosters a stress-free work environment.
00:08:11.040 It promotes better performance overall, as early identification of challenges makes a huge difference.
00:08:17.600 Communication becomes better through direct channels established during these meetings.
00:08:25.760 These key elements assist in problem-solving and reducing conflicts.
00:08:32.920 Now, I'd like to share some best practices for conducting one-on-one meetings.
00:08:41.160 Regular scheduling is crucial; it’s vital to carve out specific time in the calendars of both the manager and employee.
00:08:48.800 This isn't just a nice-to-have but a mandatory activity.
00:08:56.200 If a meeting has to be canceled, it’s better to reschedule it rather than delete it.
00:09:03.760 Deleting a meeting can convey the message that it's not important.
00:09:10.320 Having an agenda is very useful when talking to someone for the first time.
00:09:17.040 It helps both parties navigate possible discussion topics.
00:09:22.920 As the relationship grows and becomes more familiar, the need for a structured agenda may decrease.
00:09:30.560 It can just serve as a reminder for topics for future discussions.
00:09:38.820 This approach allows both people to prepare answers in advance.
00:09:46.800 The outcomes of one-on-one meetings should always include goal setting.
00:09:53.760 This helps track progress in the future.
00:10:00.240 Also, reach the meeting with a mindset of active listening.
00:10:06.840 Many people struggle to listen because they’re too focused on formulating their responses.
00:10:13.920 Arrive with an open mind; you never know where the discussion may lead.
00:10:20.560 Use the time to solve problems rather than just provide or receive answers.
00:10:27.840 It's about working collaboratively to navigate blockers.
00:10:34.320 Try to build a healthy relationship with your manager.
00:10:41.760 The primary discussions may revolve around company culture and team relationships.
00:10:48.560 Consider the satisfaction with your work environment and any obstacles you're facing.
00:10:56.320 It's crucial for younger developers to be guided in planning their daily activities.
00:11:03.920 The focus of one-on-ones should be on helping people grow.
00:11:11.520 Now that you have a better understanding of what one-on-ones are, let's discuss the role of a manager.
00:11:18.880 What do you think the role of a manager should be in this context?
00:11:24.480 One word: listen.
00:11:31.520 Additional aspects include guiding and coaching.
00:11:39.560 The kind of manager I aspire to be is a servant leader.
00:11:45.680 My success is measured by the growth and success of my team.
00:11:52.520 I know I'm doing my job well when I see my team is engaged and happy, with a healthy work environment.
00:12:01.520 Although most of you are not managers, it's vital to note that one-on-ones provide a two-way benefit.
00:12:08.720 As a developer, you can gain valuable perspectives during these meetings.
00:12:15.520 Your manager can help you see the bigger picture and identify what might be obstructing your progress.
00:12:24.840 These discussions shouldn't be perceived as judgments; they’re opportunities for improvement.
00:12:31.520 You should empower these relationships with your manager.
00:12:39.440 Your manager is advocating for you among clients and colleagues.
00:12:46.760 Feel free to express your viewpoints since your manager is there to listen.
00:12:53.040 Don’t hesitate to ask for feedback; it’s the quickest way to enhance your performance.
00:13:00.840 Remember, feedback is a two-way street, benefiting both you and your manager.
00:13:09.680 In larger companies, you may also want to know about company direction, plans, and challenges.
00:13:17.440 This time can be useful for those discussions as well.
00:13:23.760 Even if you are more reserved, your manager is equipped to assist with this process.
00:13:31.120 Remember that these interactions are human-centric, and results are unpredictable.
00:13:38.640 Your work may not be your top priority during some life phases, and that's acceptable.
00:13:45.360 The pandemic taught us the importance of achieving a better balance between work and life.
00:13:52.760 I work for a fully remote company, which prevents casual interactions in person.
00:13:59.760 One-on-ones are my opportunity to connect with colleagues on a personal level.
00:14:06.480 I often spend more time with my team during these one-on-ones to foster connections.
00:14:14.160 The sense of understanding their challenges and motivations is essential.
00:14:21.640 Recent studies show that one in four remote workers feels lonely.
00:14:29.440 In a room of people, this is a staggering statistic.
00:14:35.200 As a woman in tech, I appreciate seeing other women here, but we're still a minority.
00:14:43.120 Creating an inclusive environment requires everyone to have a voice.
00:14:50.840 Even those who are less engaged in meetings should have designated time with their managers.
00:14:59.760 If you're already conducting one-on-ones, use this opportunity to reinvigorate them.
00:15:08.840 Understand that you have significant power during this time.
00:15:16.720 For those not conducting one-on-ones, consider asking your manager to start.
00:15:23.920 There are resources available to help you lead this initiative.
00:15:31.680 If you're contemplating a job change, remember that one-on-ones are a genuine benefit.
00:15:39.200 In some organizations, reaching a manager can feel like a monumental task.
00:15:46.720 Often, we only approach them when problems become unbearable.
00:15:53.840 So, consider this when weighing your work options.
00:16:01.280 Thank you for your time.
00:16:06.680 Thank you for being here. That was my first time presenting, and I greatly appreciate it.
00:16:16.680 Now you can understand why Nebul won the award for the best place to work in Italy last year and again this year.
00:16:26.680 Do we have any questions?
00:16:35.680 Yes, there is one over there.
00:16:41.680 Hi! That was a lovely talk. My question is, if you have an agency with around 40 developers and only two or three managers, how often should one-on-ones happen?
00:16:48.360 The frequency of meetings largely depends on various factors like manager time availability.
00:16:54.680 In this case, it may not be feasible to meet weekly. Instead, consider monthly meetings.
00:17:02.600 These meetings could extend beyond 30 minutes to accommodate discussions.
00:17:09.120 Moreover, you might organize smaller team or retrospective meetings in addition.
00:17:17.760 Absolutely, holding weekly meetings but in a rushed manner isn’t productive.
00:17:25.120 Adjust expectations based on the unique circumstances you're facing.
00:17:32.560 So, a thoughtful weekly timeline is essential.
00:17:38.760 Two questions actually! I’m also curious if you’ve encountered resistance to regular one-on-ones with developers.
00:17:45.960 There was indeed a case where a developer resisted personal sharing.
00:17:53.440 We discussed meeting expectations, and eventually found a comfortable compromise.
00:17:59.240 It's about tailoring the conversation style to suit individual comfort levels.
00:18:06.800 Hello! I’ve often wondered how to build a trusting relationship with someone higher in hierarchy.
00:18:15.760 The success of one-on-ones is often tied to the overall company culture.
00:18:24.160 If the culture is supportive, it's less likely that one will face severe negative repercussions.
00:18:30.720 Trust in this very dynamic is built within that context.
00:18:36.000 Many companies maintain an inclusive ecosystem, mitigating fear of hierarchy.
00:18:42.960 If you're in a testing environment, seek a path to productive relationships.
00:18:48.520 Building relationships during one-on-ones is an opportunity for informal conversations.
00:18:56.720 This creates a foundation wherein both parties can express themselves publicly.
00:19:04.480 If that dynamic is missing, it could lead to larger issues.
00:19:12.720 I’m intrigued by how you harness one-on-ones as a benefit for both parties!
00:19:20.960 If there are one-on-ones, it's likely a company trying to create a positive environment.
00:19:26.760 Those with less frequent meetings should evaluate their current environment.
00:19:33.200 It may be challenging to establish if there are no routines.
00:19:40.720 Lastly, what advice can you share with developers eager to implement one-on-ones?
00:19:47.040 To implement one-on-ones, assess the interests and concerns of your managers.
00:19:55.760 Share articles, leverage awareness, and show the potential advantages.
00:20:01.840 Start discussing expectations and present goals that could be achieved through them.
00:20:10.160 If possible, propose a trial period—maybe for a month!
00:20:19.120 Ensure to gauge satisfaction and productivity.
00:20:25.240 Generally, one-on-ones are about balancing the need for structured communication.
00:20:32.640 However, avoid overwhelm!
00:20:39.920 Prioritize value over quantity.
00:20:46.720 Be thoughtful when planning approaches.
00:20:54.560 The key concerns highlighted during these sessions are essential to monitor.
00:21:03.760 Ultimately, it’s about structuring these discussions to foster meaningful connections.
00:21:09.440 Content leads to value, leading to improvement—this is a beneficial cycle.
00:21:16.560 Do we really have time for one more question?
00:21:23.440 It's crucial for everyone, including managers, to engage in one-on-ones.
00:21:30.760 These meetings aren’t just for employees, but they must be reciprocal.
00:21:38.160 It’s a cascade effect; they strengthen relationships.
00:21:46.440 Ensure to create a culture where these meetings are embraced!
00:21:53.520 Thank you, everyone, for your time and questions!
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